I’m a girl, and i was raised Catholic in a very devout family. I’ve gone to catholic schools for most of my education. in middle school, I realized that I was bisexual. I used to think about leaving the church because i want to be able to live fully as God made me, but I love the church too much to do that. i know the church says that I can’t ever act on these feelings that I have for other women, but i also feel like the church is wrong in the teachings on homosexuality. I know God made me like this for a reason, and I know that He loves me and that I love Him. maybe my job on earth is to make changes in the church. I don’t know what to do. I’m scared. I feel like it would be disingenuous to keep this part of myself locked up, but I don’t want to go against the church even though I think something is wrong. I don’t want to be a heretic, and I don’t want to go to hell. i have chronic depression, and this internal battle constantly drives me closer and closer to suicide. I just wish that the church would listen to people like me, actually have dialogue with people like me. I think that if they did, they wouldn’t teach the things that they do. i don’t know. im so scared and confused.
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